The Influence and Power of Motherhood

I've had more than a few looks from people when they ask what I do, and I reply that I'm a mother. Some feel I'm wasting my talents. Some think I've got it easy. Some say that at least I don't have to deal with the pressure of a job.

We had an interesting discussion at church yesterday about the role of mothers. It was based around an article written by Julie B Beck, called "Mother Who Know". It was an inspiring, although overwhelming, reminder of just how much weight we mothers carry on our shoulders. Here are some excerpts that really spoke to me:

"More than at any time in the history of the world, we need mothers who know...When mothers know who they are and who God is...they will have great power and influence for good on their children.

"Mothers who know desire to bear children. Whereas in many cultures in the world children are becoming less valued...young couples should not postpone having children. In the eternal perspective, children - not poessessions, not position, not prestige - are our greatest jewels.

"Mothers who know are nurturers. To nurture means to cultivate, care for, and make grow. Therefore, mothers who know create a climate for spiritual and temporal growth in their homes. Nurturing requires organization, patience, love, and work.

"Mothers who know are leaders. In equal partnership with their husbands, they lead a great and eternal organization. These mothers plan for the future of their organization. They plan for missions, temple marriages, and education. They plan for prayer, scripture study, and family home evening. Mothers who know build children into future leaders and are the primary examples of what leaders look like. They do not abandon their plan by succumbing to social pressure and worldly models of parenting. These wise mothers who know are selective about their own activities and involvement to conserve their limited strength in order to maximize their influence where it matters most.

"Mothers who know are teachers...A well-taught friend told me that he did not learn anything at church that he had not already learned at home.

"Mothers who know do less. they permit less of what will not bear good fruit eternally. They allow less media in their homes, less distraction, less activity that draws their children away from their home....[Mothers] consume less of the world's goods. They spend more time eating together, more time working together, more time reading together, more time talking, laughing, singing and exemplifying. These mothers choose carefully and do not try to do it all.

"Their goal is to prepare a rising generation of children who will take the gospel of Jesus Christ into the entire world. Their goal is to prepare future fathers and mothers who will be builders of the Lord's kingdom."

So next time someone thinks what you women at home are doing isn't important, perhaps this can be your reply: "I'm raising the future of God's kingdom. What did you do today?" Remember, fellow sisters and mamas - we are arguably doing the most important job on the planet - raising the future of tomorrow. Our children can grow up to make a difference in this world - be it world-wide or on a much smaller scale. We mothers have great influence and power in how our world is taking shape. Stand strong and immovable in that which you believe, and take heart - we're all in this together!

Will somebody pay attention to me please?

Amid a whirl of activity yesterday, Colin was desperately trying to get James' attention:
Colin: Daddy? Daddy? Daddy! James! Sweetie!

***

During our week-long moratorium on movies:
Colin: Dumbo?
Mom: No, Colin. No Dumbo. No movies today.
Colin: Bug's Life?
Mom: No. No movies. Would you like to do a puzzle with me?
Colin: Monsters?
Mom: No movies.
(pause)
Colin: Toy Story? Okay.

Having given himself permission, he proceeded to get the movie out and put it on himself.

***

At the end of naptime, Colin often crouches at the return vent in his room, which leads to our family, and calls down to us. He likes to let us know he's awake and ready to come out of his room.

Colin: Mommy? Mommy? Somebody?

He Who Walks with the Wise Grows Wise

Why is it that each next generation now thinks they know better? We look at our parents and say "I see what you've done, but I'm pretty sure I can do it better (without your help)." I read an interesting proverb today: "He who walks with the wise grows wise." There is a reason our society includes our elders - and it's not to hide them away in a place with others of their age. Do you realize that ours is the first age in which 'seniors residences' exist? In time past, older members of the family lived with the younger ones. And it wasn't considered a financial or other type of burden. It was an opportunity for the younger members to take something from their years of experience. No amount of book knowledge can come close to the benefits of experience.

Now I'm not putting down growth and progress. Hopefully, as a society, we are each advancing a little further than the last. But I hope we can try to remember this proverb in our search for wisdom.

Diamond Dust

Today out of my bedroom window I saw diamond dust falling from the sky. These tiny little snow flakes sparkled in the morning sun as they gently danced in the air. As I rocked Caleb to sleep, I marvelled at the natural beauty that surrounds us. It makes me yearn for a world free from artificial additions, adorned only by that made by the hand of God.

You can't take it with you...

"He who dies with the most stuff...still dies."
"You can't take it with you."
" Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal."

Have you ever noticed how much stuff we have? And how we never seem to feel like we have enough? And how much worth we place on things?

I have a pot at home, that we call the "Mrs. Mennill Pot". It was given to us at our wedding by one of James' high school teachers. It is a fantastic skillet: thick, heavy, and obviously of great monetary worth. It has a solid handle and a glass lid, and I have made some really great stir-fries in it. From the beginning, I took great care of this pot. I never used any metal utensil on it and never fried anything in it like eggs or hamburgers. I always rinsed it immediately after using it, using only a soft cloth, never a scrubbing pad.

Then yesterday as I was washing out hamburger grease that had been caked on for at least four or five hours, I chuckled to myself at how "low" this pot had come. The bottom of the pot was scratched, and I haven't tightened the handle in quite a while. I didn't get a new one, neither had this pot lost its charm or use. It just didn't hold the same position in my value system as it once did.

I find the same thing happens with many different things: a new book, a new sweater - for the first while you try not to bend the cover of the book back, or you hand wash and reshape that sweater. But then as time goes by it becomes just another thing in a house full of things.

Having children has taught me many things, but one of the biggest lessons I've learned is not to place so much value on "stuff". My clothes are going to be thrown up on. My books are going to be coloured in. Plates are going to be broken. Carpets are going to be stained. Things get torn, broken, ruined. If I have no attachment to them in the first place, the disappointment from their eventual and inevitable demise is significantly less.

It also makes it much easier to part with things I no longer need. I learned a great lesson about this from my grandmother. I am one who holds onto things forever, knowing that "one day I'll need this". My grandmother, however, has a good hold on what is worth keeping and what is not. The other day my grandmother called to offer me a crockpot. "I bought it last month, and it has just sat in its box since then. Would you like it?" A month! It takes a least a year of not using something before I reluctantly wonder if I'll ever need it again. I've been trying harder to be more ruthless now - both parting with the old and refraining from buying the new. Maybe clearing my house out a little will give us a little more breathing room, literally and figuratively!

What can one person do?

A while back, James and I rented the film "Amazing Grace", about a man named Wilberforce who pioneered the end of slavery in England. It was a moving example of the kind of difference one person can make in this world.

I have always been a humanitarian. I often feel as though there is so much change in this world that needs to happen, and there is so little I can do about it. I have dreams of teaching children in Africa, of digging wells and planting trees, of inspiring the youth of today to become leaders of tomorrow, of building homes in the islands hit by the tsunami, of stopping gun violence, of bringing warm clothes to the homeless in Eastern Europe, of reducing our footprint on this planet. I am antsy in one place, knowing how large the world is, how privileged my life is, and how much need is out there. My life feels full to the brink with daily duties, to the point that I fear I'll be stuck here forever, unable to affect anything at all.

There have been great men and women in history that combined passion with action to change the world in which they lived, and yet I think to most of us, they seem to be figures that are far beyond us.

But here are two quotes that I have come across lately, that are giving me hope that there is something that I can do.

***
"Great men and women - some famous, most not..."
- Susan V. Bosak
***
"There may be times when we are powerless to prevent injustice, but there must never be a time when we fail to protest. "
- Elie Wiesel
***

May I always remember to stand up for what I believe in, and remember that some of the greatest works I do will be within the walls of my own home.

Feeling overwhelmed?

The Girl in a Whirl
by 'Dr. Suess'( a.k.a.. Vickie Gunther)

Look at me, look at me, look at me now!
You could do what I do If you only knew how.
I study the scriptures one hour each day;
I bake, I upholster, I scrub, and I pray.
I always keep all the commandments completely;
I speak to my little ones gently and sweetly.
I help in their classrooms! I sew all they wear!
I drive them to practice! I cut all their hair!
I memorize names of the General Authorities;
I focus on things to be done by priorities.
I play the piano! I bless with my talents!
My toilets all sparkle! My checkbooks all balance!
Each week every child gets a one-on-one date;
I attend all my meetings (on time! Never late!)
I'm taking a class on the teachings of Paul,
But that is not all! Oh, no. That is not all.
I track my bad habits 'til each is abolished;
Our t-shirts are ironed! My toenails are polished!
Our family home evenings are always delightful;
The lessons I give are both fun and insightful.
I do genealogy faithfully, too.
It's easy to do all the things that I do!
I rise each day early, refreshed and awake;
I know all the names of each youth in my stake!
I read to my children! I help all my neighbors!
I bless the community, too, with my labors.
I exercise and I cook menus gourmet;
My visiting teaching is done the first day!
(I also go do it for someone who missed hers.
It's the least I can do for my cherished ward sisters.)
I chart resolutions and check off each goal;
I seek each "lost lamb" on my Primary roll.
I can home-grown produce each summer and fall.
But that is not all! Oh, no. That is not all.
I write in my journal! I sing in the choir!
Each day, I write "thank you's" to those I admire.
My sons were all Eagles when they were fourteen!
My kids get straight A's! And their bedrooms are clean!
I have a home business to help make some money;
I always look beautifully groomed for my honey.
I go to the temple at least once a week;
I change the car's tires! I fix the sink's leak!
I grind my own wheat and I bake all our bread;
I have all our meals planned out six months ahead.
I make sure I rotate our two-years' supply;
My shopping for Christmas is done by July!
These things are not hard; 'tis good if you do them;
You can if you try! Just set goals and pursue them!
It's easy to do all the things that I do!
If you plan and work smart, you can do them all, too!
It's easy!" she said...and then she dropped dead.