Benjaminugget

(In trying to toilet train, Benjamin gets one chocolate chip, that we call candy, for every time he pees in the toilet, and two for every time he...does more.)

Benjamin: I'm hungry.
Mom: Your dinner is still on the table.  Go eat that.
Benjamin: Can I have a candy?
Mom: No, but you can eat your dinner.
(pause)
Benjamin: I have to go poo.

(He goes to the toilet, works really hard, and manages two little successes)

Benjamin: I went poo on the potty!  So...two candies!!!!
Mom: Yes, I suppose you do.

(Lots of rejoicing among family members, since this is the first time he's ever pooped on the toilet.  We all settle back in to reading.)

Benjamin: I have to poop again!

(He goes to the toilet and then jumps back up.  Sure enough, he has managed a little more.  He gets his reward.  I'm starting to think he's going to just let it out bit by bit until he fills himself up with chocolate!  We go back to reading.)

Benjamin: I'm going to try and go poop again.  Actually, there are lots of little poops.  It's going to be disgusting...

(Too smart, that boy.)