Tuesday, 5 May 2015

Defining life

Growing up, I always knew that my mom wanted to be a teacher.  She achieved that goal as I was finishing high school.  The story was well known of how she knew by the age of five years that was what she wanted to do.  Once she finally graduated and was hired on, she loved every second of it.  She clearly had one passion, one drive, and she worked tirelessly toward it and then tirelessly in it.

I have struggled in comparison.  I never felt one specific calling; instead I have felt pulled in many directions.  Every time I try to make a defining decision some other part of me starts to rear up in protest.

I have been a music teacher.
I have been a filmmaker.
I have been an advertiser.
I have been an accountant.
I have been a photographer.
I have been a teacher.

And those are the paid careers.

I am a mother.
I am a wife.
I am a children's ministry leader.
I am a bible study leader.

Those are my volunteer areas.

I love libraries.
I love conducting.
I love traveling.
I love the theatre.
I love writing.

Those are my interests.

I feel like I could have a "career" in every single one of these areas and be overjoyed.  If I had to choose to spend every day for the rest of my life in any one of these, I absolutely could.

And yet I feel such a strong pull to each one.  I feel as though, instead, I can't simply choose to devote the time a career takes (40 hours a week, for example) to just one, because it would squeeze out too much.  I feel as though, instead, I will be the sort to always be moving, shifting, changing.


Bonnie said...


I believe that you have an artist's spirit, which cannot be tethered to any one thing. You are so full of passion that honing in on one angle might perhaps leave you "off balance".

Your delight in so many aspects of life is beautiful. This world needs people just like you, who see beauty and connections and possibilities everywhere.

You are such a blessing! I'm glad you are the way you are... only, I'm a little bit sad that we don't live closer!

I look forward to hearing how your future unfolds :)

Terri-Ann said...

Yep - spot on Bonnie! I also wish we could sit about on a sunglow porch and muse about life and the universe. Ah well. We'll have to make do with spurring each other's thoughts on via the internet. Any word about your family camp again this year? While James can't get time off in the summer, I'm always looking for activities for myself and the kids.