Hibernation

I am growing weary of the winter. The snowflakes still fall and gracefully blanket the ground; the sun still rises into the clear blue sky that signifies a deep chill in the air; none of the beauty of the season is lost, and yet I grow tired of it all.

I am a hibernating creature. For whatever physical reason, I feel the cold in my body deeper than most. When I step outside, I am bundled in layer upon layer upon layer. (I am often mocked for my obvious lack of Canadian blood. I tell them I have Australian blood running through me.) No matter my positive outlook or clothing preparation, it's only a matter of minutes before every bone in my body is chilled to the point of giving up my attempts to enjoy this beautiful season. Not even my love of hockey, skating and sledding can conquer my body's natural reaction. For the most part, I spend these months inside. Which grows tortuous for one like me who needs to regularly commune with the natural world outside.

I usually sit at my kitchen table to write these entries, which means I'm gazing out our back window. This makes a lovely frame onto a winter vista. It also feels like staring out a prison window, the bars of the frame casting a shadow onto my table. Each day I look out and feel the weight of being inside bear down.

"I'm dreaming of a green spring, just like the ones I used to know-
With the treetops budding, and children playing
And birds flying to and fro
I'm dreaming of green spring, with every blog entry I write
May the days be warm and bright, and may my toes not get frostbite."

Actually, I'm dreaming of my new fence, a beautiful green lawn, Colin spending his energy running about in the fresh air, Caleb sitting out on a blanket and me stretched out with my book. I'm dreaming about planting my first garden (!) and sipping lemonade and grilling hamburgers and vegetables and corn and fish on the barbecue. I'm dreaming about getting to know my neighbours and having my friends and their children over to play and eat in the backyard. I can almost feel the sun beating down on my skin, that warm hug that envelops you with its rays.

But for now, I hibernate. It's not all that bad. Usually hibernation involves food also, and so I take comfort in some delightful snacks - my two greatest weaknesses being chocolate cookies with milk, and fruit salad. I know come summer I'll dream again of white winters, rosy cheeks and frosted noses, hot chocolate and softly falling snow. Ah, why can't we ever be completely satisfied with what we have?!