There are finally leaves on the trees outside my bedroom window.
Most of you probably think this is a fairly obvious statement, considering it's mid-May and by all accounts leaves on trees in May is not an unusual thing.
I have had the opportunity, however, to watch the bare branches of winter bloom into the shade-giving trees of spring. Much of the last two months I spent in bed were also passed in a fair amount of pain that made doing almost anything unbearable. So I spent most days staring out the window of our 5th floor apartment at the tree that stands outside. One day I noticed the bare branches had tiny little nubs on them, almost like little beetles. Slowly more and more nubs appeared, and each of these slowly grew into buds. Then the buds flowered (reminding me of "Popcorn Popping", an old Primary song from my childhood). Then...nothing. For weeks and weeks and weeks the little flowers appeared to have stopped growing. I would try to convince myself that I could see something emerging from them, but a closer look revealed nothing.
Then one day last week I woke up and looked out the window and was amazed at the pale green garden of leaves that had burst from the blossoms. Literally overnight, what I had been waiting for for so long, had happened.
Now I look out the window and wish for the beautiful white and pink blossoms again. There are a few late bloomers, some leaves still waiting to grow. I strangely find myself cheering them on, and yet reveling in their infancy.
Once again I have learned a life lesson in the beauty of nature. As much as I can't wait for the day when Colin can communicate with us, or when we can kick around a soccer ball, or I can help him with his homework, I'm realizing that one day (overnight) he'll be grown and I'll long for the days when a smile broke across his face when I woke him in the morning. I'll miss the days when he pulled me over to a chair, climbed up on my lap and plunked down five or six books for reading.
I can't believe I've already passed 26 years of life, which I'm sure has gone by even faster for my parents. I know that then next 26 years will be gone before I know it, so I'm going to spend more time on today and less time worrying about tomorrow. Let tomorrow take care of itself.
1 comment:
I love how thought provoking your entries are, honey. I love how you can see so much out there - how you can relate what you see to your life. I REALLY think you should try to find a place to share your comments with more people. :-) I do understand how fast time goes - now that you are a mom with a little boy and one on the way. Sometimes I wish I could go back for a minute to a place in time I remember. Memories are so fleeting sometimes - it's great to have a journal (or a blog :-) to remind ourselves of the happenings that occur each day. I like how you take pleasure in the small things, too. Reading with Colin is such a pleasure for you both and something Colin will treasure as he grows older. You will love it, too, not only for the time you get to spend together now, but also for the love of reading that you are instilling in him. To know how much pleasure you get from reading will help you know how much pleasure he will get from it as he grows.
Post a Comment