I had another ultrasound today, and have another one scheduled in 2 1/2 weeks. Every time I go and I see my name on their computer, it says in big capital letters "OB - HIGH RISK." I hate that. This is my third ultrasound of the pregnancy, and each time there's it been. They are kind of scary words to associate with your own pregnancy. Luckily, everything is 100% awesome with our little baby. Every technician is so good to me, talking me through every shot, assuring me everything looks perfect. The "high risk" is there because of the Hyperemesis Gravadarium, which can often mean premature labour and birth, and low birth weight. (Which, at this point, being nearly 35 weeks, I'll take!) It doesn't look like the baby will be too small, either, since he/she is already over 5 lbs. Maybe a little on the small side, since the baby is measuring only 33 weeks, but not by much.
Anyone know anything I can do to bring on labour? I've been feeling even worse now that I'm off the Zofran. The diclectin is letting me eat and keep food down, but the nausea and dizziness and near-fainting is really strong and constant now. I'm back at not wanting to eat anything at all, which of course is no good. It makes me wonder how quickly I'll bounce back after the birth. Will I have any lingering psychological issues about eating? I'll mentally know that eating won't make me sick anymore, but after 8 months straight of having very strong aversions to eating, I wonder if it will take a while for me to get over that instinct?
The end is nigh, the end is nigh, the end is nigh.
A friend asked if I was ready for the baby to come. Strangely enough, I haven't packed my bag or the baby's bag, I haven't washed the baby clothes, I haven't set up a cradle or found the linens. It's like there is this brick wall ahead of me, that is the actual delivery. Everything I'm doing is just looking to that wall. I know that beyond it there is a whole new world of having a little baby around the house, but I think my mind won't let me go there, because it just needs to deal with this illness right now. It's sort of like when you have a BIG project looming - all your thought and energy needs to just focus on that one thing. Anything that happens after that can be dealt with later. That's how I feel about the coming home with a baby. I'll deal with it all later.