Wednesday, 30 May 2012

It's not science, it's motherhood

I'll admit I stole that tag line from a magazine cover I saw in the OB office today.  I will also admit I did not read the article, so this is in no way commenting on whatever position that author took.  But just the idea gave me pause for thought today.

It is so true.  Motherhood has been turned into a science, a psychology study, and a business over the years.  We've moved from just trying to share our wisdom, experience and ideas with each other to competing and judging and exerting authority over each other.

Whenever I encounter something unsettling or worrying about mothering, I repeat this to myself:

Women have been doing this for thousands of years.  Billions of mothers have done it before.  And I can do it now.

Mothers raised children without a bookshelf of parenting books.  They taught their children values and principles without expert-published programs.  Many influential men and women were raised in humble homes by mothers not revered by anyone else.  Good has been done quietly throughout all the generations of the past without every thought and action of a mother being dissected.

It's not science, it's motherhood.  More than anything else, it's instinctual.  There is an inherent characteristic we women possess that allows us to navigate the waters of mothering our own children in exactly the way they need.  While I do believe in learning new things and mothering with a purpose, it is most important to remember that we are naturally equipped with everything we need to be wonderful mothers.

So let's get back to the idea of the primitive community, where we share what we know with other mothers because of a genuine love of our calling, not because we have read the most books or have determined the "right" way to raise kids.  Let's join together to share in our trials and our triumphs.  Let's hook arms and carry each other forward, one step at a time.  Isn't that the most beautiful image of motherhood?

1 comment:

Jennifer said...

Well said! I need to remember this more often. I am always asking other mother's what they did and how and when to do something. Maybe I need to relax a little and just take it a day at a time. Thanks for this!!!