Wednesday, 29 June 2011

Go to bed at 10pm

My kids are generally in bed and asleep around 7:30pm. I usually head up just before 11pm to watch the first 5 minutes of the 11:00 news.

As I have dragged on and on while waking up through the night with Benjamin, it occurred to me that I probably should just go to bed earlier. I'm often complaining come 9pm that I'm tired, I have a headache, I'm exhausted, or something in that vein. Then James turns to me and tells me to go to bed.

But I don't. You see, as an introvert, I need this time, awake, when I can just sit without people needing me. Time to read or write or do my own thing. I relish this time I have to myself, and I can't seem to give up that last hour yet! I keep telling myself why go to bed at 10pm when I will have to wake at 11:00 anyway to nurse Benjamin. I might as well just stay up.

So there exists this hazy goal/idea in the back of my mind that I really should readjust my thinking, watch the 10pm CBC news instead, and pack it in there. That way when I have to get up at 6am with the boys, I've at least be in bed for 8 hours. (Benjamin still nurses at 11pm, 2am and 5am, but that's a different matter.)

Sometimes I think we are masters of our own demises. I guess what this all really means is that if I insist on staying up, I should at least stop complaining.


Anonymous said...

I am the exact same way! Alexander is in bed by 8 and Dominic is down by 9 30...and yet I can't fall asleep at 10 or even 11! And I'm soooo exhausted every day! I just can't give up those few hours of peace and quiet to read or play a game! But I really should just GO TO BED!!

Mom said...

You are both so like your mother (and no, you cannot blame me :-) I used take care of you girls, the house, etc. and then do school stuff 'til 10pm. I should have gone to bed then, but I just wanted ONE hour for me and going to sleep didn't seem like it was a way for me to just chill. So, 11pm it was. :-)